Of full moons and pterodactyls
by forestandwings
Summary: The full moon is approaching, Remus is avoiding Sirius and dinosaurs aren't actually extinct.


**Disclaimer: only the monster bird belongs to me.**

Sirius:

Why universe? Why Remus? He's such a good human: he always folds his socks. Yet the gods that sit on their arses up in heaven messing things up for all us innocent folk had a right giggle when they made his dad insult Fenrir Greyback, of all people. And he's so kind and dedicated and determined and funny and loyal and he has the sexiest way of yawning... but I seem to be missing the point here. He could have a great life, but instead is eternally shunned for something that he has no control over and causes him so much pain. His life is haunted by the threat of the full moon, looming over him like a constant companion of fear. I'm sorry, was that not clear enough? He's a werewolf. And now it's nearly the full moon. The wolf has almost taken over. He barely talks to anyone, especially me (Which I will never understand, who could possibly resist such charming company?)

Remus:

This is stupid. So absurdly moronic. I am having an argument. With myself. And it's not even a proper argument. Both sides of me are arguing that I love Sirius. So why. Am I having. This bloody argument?! The thing is, I know he could never love a monster like me when he's so perfect. But I still wish he could just leave all the adoring girls who worship the ground he walks on (honestly, it's really rather pathetic) and let me be the only one who does that! But the wolf seems to think that my undying love for Sirius means I should randomly have irresistible impulses to jump on him and snog him senseless. And now the idiot thinks I'm avoiding him. Hence my argument. With myself. Oh dear, here I go again.

Sirius:

We're in the Shrieking Shack. It's not shrieking quite yet though. Bloody Prongs and Wormy have landed themselves in a detention with Minnie, _again_. So now I must be the only one to protect my poor Moony from himself while resisting his wolfy charm.

"Are you sure you'll be alright without the other twits? I don't want to accidentally hurt you, Pads" my angelic werewolf said. It's adorable how much he cares about others.

"Don't worry, Moony. Everything will be fine."

Remus:

It's only Sirius, and I am now officially freaking out. I have absolutely no control over the wolf in that form. None. Niemand. Kein. Nijedan. Ceann ar bith. Why the hell do I know what none is in so many languages? Anyway... ow

Sirius:

My eyes are steadily adjusting to the bright morning light. Oh yeah, I'm in the shack. It's not shrieking anymore so I dropped that bit. Remus is beside me. He's naked. Well, that's new. Normally James wakes up before me and throws a cloak over him. I guess I should probably do that, we wouldn't want an angry Moony on the loose. Never mind, it seems he's awake.

"Good morning Sunshine!" I chirp.

"Sirius... It's pouring with rain."

"And what's the problem with that?"

"It's hardly a good morning."

"The birds seem to disagree with you."

"What birds?"

"This one." I say proudly, brandishing my wand ready to use my considerable talent to transfigure an ordinary autumn leaf into a magnificent songbird preferably a nightingale or... Wait, what?

"IT'S A BLOODY PTERODACTYL YOU UTTER IMBECILE "

"Oops. What is a terryducktill, exactly?"

"Never mind, just run!"

We sprint for the door as my monstrous creation chases us, but as Moony paused (for some unknown quest that would never work because I didn't think of it) I run into him and we both tumble to the ground outside. We lie there laughing for a while, and it suddenly occurs to me that I am on top of him. But Remus doesn't seem to have any objections so I make no move to get up. I glance down and look into his fiery amber eyes for what seems like an eternity but then the moment passes as we hear a loud crash. My evil creation is trying to escape! Moony grabs my hand and we run in blind terror back into the safety of our dorm. Wait a minute. Why is he holding my hand... not that I mind but...

"SIRIUS WHY ARE YOU STOPPING IT'S GAINING ON US!"

Remus:

Yes, I know. But grabbing his hand was a moment of weakness never to be mentioned again. The idiot must have noticed too, because he's slowing down. We approach the Fat Lady yelling "PUMPKINS, PUMPKINS!"(No, we aren't crazy, it's the password) and don't stop running until we crash into James halfway up the staircase.

"Bloody hell!" He shouts at us angrily.

"Pterodactyl!" I yell as I run past.

"Bless you?" He asks, slightly confused.

"Why are you blessing Remus, he didn't make the monster bird" Sirius says, sounding rather hurt.

"Monster bird?" James repeats faintly.

"What are you, a parrot? Pterodactyl!" I shout.

"Have you got a cold, Moony?" James asks. My friends are total idiots.

"Do I need to spell it out for you!" I say, exasperated, "A giant monster bird is coming to turn us all into hamburgers!" A slightly dishevelled head appears from beneath the covers.

"Hamburger?" Pete asks blearily.

"We're the hamburgers." Sirius explains.

"Why are we hamburgers again?"

"Because of the bloody pterodactyl!"

"You really should see Pomfrey for that cold, Moons."

"Everyone shut up and take cover!" Sirius screams.

Suddenly the door flies open and an angry Lily Evans bursts in. "What the hell is going on in here?!"

"THERE'S A PTERODACTYL!" We yell as one.

"Why is there... actually, I don't want to know. Reparifarge." A leaf drifts pitifully to the ground and Lily glares round at us.

"Lilykins... you saved us!" James exclaims. He and Pete follow the poor girl out of the room, leaving me and Sirius alone.

"So..." Sirius starts to speak but words fail him.

"That was a close call, wasn't it"

"Yeah. I'm just kinda sad that..." he mumbles something I don't quite hear.

"What was that"

"Oh nothing, I just feel kinda sorry for the bird"

"Yeah right, what is it really?"

"Why have you been avoiding me, Moony?"

Uh oh. "Changing the subject much?" I say, trying to avoid answering.

"Yes I am. But please answer the question."

"It has become... rather difficult... to keep the wolf at bay when I am around you lately."

"But why?" Sirius asks earnestly. "Is it something I've done? You know I would do anything to help you, I love you Moony."

What. That doesn't make sense. Am I dreaming?

"Seriously?" I ask him

"Oh merlin's pants did I say that out loud?! I'm so sorry Moony I've just ruined our friendship" Sirius flops down on his bed and I walk over to him.

"I love you too idiot"

"Really?" I laugh at the surprised look on his face and kiss him gently. But then, with impeccable timing as always, James walks in... well this will be awkward.

"MY EYES!"

He always was a tad dramatic.

**Reviewers are safe from pterodactyls!**


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